After the first sleepless night in the waiting room, my parents booked Ali and I a hotel nearby for the second night. The practicalities began to set in as we began to have more exposure and time in the NICU life.
These things need to be done now, if not sooner:
I needed to get on the phone and salvage any cancelation I could for every accommodation and flight for our Iceland and visiting Emily and Luke in England trip.
Meet with social worker
Meet with Doctor's during their rounds
Start the Certification forms for James with Service Canada
Apply for PCIC (parents of critically ill children) leave for Ali
Kickstart Ali's maternity leave by contacting her work and applying for EI
Research walk in clinics for Alison to have a check up post birth
Contact my work and union
Find a cheap location where Ali and I can stay while our son is at Sick Kids
Connect with family and friends with updates
Coordinate a schedule for visiting times between our contacts
Find ways of sneaking eating and sleeping into our days
Oh, and Ali had to pump every three hours, since James was too young to breastfeed
Kangaroo care (holding skin to skin with your baby) could happen after James' feeding times every two hours within the short window of allowing him to sleep and not be disturbed during handling times
So, as you can tell, add the emotional pull of concern for your son and serious lack of sleep and the anxiety levels were through the roof. Walking from the hotel to Sick Kids that morning, I felt a wave of exhaustion I haven't experienced before. It was like my body was powering down. I felt nauseous and needed to sit down for a moment. Ali went to get us both a coffee and I sat down in the atrium beside the water feature.
At this moment, waiting at a small table for two and placing my head on the table in exhaustion, I heard the sound of reassurance and of providence. Water cascading over the separate platforms reminded me that life always moves. It shifts and adjusts to its environment in unexpected ways. The sound of water was so calming, it slowed my breathing and regulated my heartbeat. My nausea passed and I felt a renewed energy. I could sense a serenity that went beyond my understanding. I was reminded that life, through the metaphor of water, is resilient. Water sustains living beings throughout all of the mysteries of the seasons we find ourselves in. The subtle, muted trickle of this water feature was placed in the middle of the atrium, the gathering place for those living in tumultuous times. It was a reassurance to me that God had James under his provision and that we would make it through these difficult times.
After the day of tackling my list, with the help of my amazing mom, and visiting James I was told that the social worker wanted to see us. We had been accepted into the Ronald McDonald House to stay at a subsidized cost for the remaining time that James was at Sick Kids. Relief washed over me. As the staff member showed me around the place I began to cry, the thankfulness in my heart could not be held back. We were in walking distance to the hospital, surrounded by other families living a similar reality, and they even provided meals and suggested we bring guests over to eat with us during our stay. They were an absolute answer to prayer.
